Someone called me fat today. I didn’t know how to react so I just laughed it off. But it really really, really hurt my self esteem, so I just pretended I was mad, when I was really really just sad.
I don’t know, I just feel so self conscious- body image conscious when I’m around him, it’s insane. It’s as if I’m not good enough. And if that’s the case, why are we still friends.
And to be honest, when I looked into the mirror I thought I looked lovely and I thought I looked beautiful.
I know, I know all that about myself. It’s like someone’s tearing you apart. Imagine someone telling you a negative thing everyday about yourself; your hair is bad, your eyes are tiny, your face is so chubby I mean, don’t you think I have a fucking mirror? It pisses me off but it hurts me even more; that they have won. And I don’t know what to do.