Motives are very important to remain calm.
If we always carry a bag of disgust just right under the radar of conscious, we constantly seek the confirmation that we really are the worthless people we think we are.
When others madden us, we need to imagine the turmoil, disappointment, worry and sadden that is hiding beneath the surface. We need to gage compassion to those that annoy us. We must do that very strange thing, we must move from anger to pity.